Living a Passionate Life #3 – integrating our shadows and kinks

Cynthia Connopessence, feminine, masculine, passion, polarity, relationships, spiritually sexy0 Comments

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Darker energy creates more passion, and it gives us the rocket fuel to create our heart-goals – both in our relationships and in our work spheres. And how do we integrate these powerful forces to be living a more passionate life?

Below are practical, real suggestions that help us integrate our shadows and kinks. It is not a process that happens overnight, but developing these skills will make a huge difference. The primary intention is to come into your body, deepen your breath, open your heart and feel.

“fear, anger, judgement….. a direct route to love”

  1. Acknowledging our darker energies of fear, anger, judgement, hate, closure etc is a direct route to love. Embrace it, confess it. No big deal. We all have versions of the same feelings at times.
  2. Getting to know when our breathing is shallow, or we are tense in the stomach or jaw, isolating from others, being addictive, running negative thoughts through our minds. This is our truth in that moment. No judgement.
  3. Noticing our body and mind tension we can breathe and relax it, slowly letting our shoulders soften down, our jaw loosen… a sigh may come. Nothing forced or hard. The idea is to stop making effort rather than add more!
  4. Bringing attention to the front of your body, is it soft or rigid, are you open here or protected? Allowing a softening to occur using breath and intention. Not resisting just allowing.
  5. Grounding into your body by bringing awareness to your hips and pelvis, legs, feet. The lower body has a lot of power in it. Be aware of all the four corners of your feet,
  6. If you are with somebody make easy eye contact, practicing all of the above. Soft breath, open body, grounding down, and feel their heart with your heart. Coming into the now in this way creates a possibility of love.
  7. As you relax into the fullness of softening there may be an increase in the shadow feelings initially. This may be uncomfortable, but its important to say yes to this stage. It will pass more quickly by allowing than repressing. Exaggerating can be helpful too, so we begin to be ‘actors’, with humour about ourselves. Being able to laugh at ourselves is magic for transformation.
  8. Once the feelings recede you will feel more open and powerful, unafraid of your shadow and kinks. Action becomes spontaneous, arising from love and freedom.

(LIVING A PASSIONATE LIFE #1 is here.  LIVING A PASSIONATE LIFE #2  is here. LIVING A PASSIONATE LIFE #4 is here.)

Or come to a Living Love workshop and embrace your shadow energy and kinks with love, compassion and humour!

Cynthia Connop
Founder
About the author:
Cynthia Connop is a relationship consultant, international documentary filmmaker and the founder and facilitator of the Living Love programs.

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